Being Human
by Little Blue Owl
Summary: N doesn't quite understand humans. HildaxN oneshot


Being Human

Disclaimer: I do not own Pokemon, or any of its plots/characters.

N doesn't quite understand humans. Hilda/N

Hilda tipped her head back and felt the sun tickle every pore on her skin. She loved the warm weather more than most people knew, and it was just breezy enough with the heat to take a walk.

Early springtime made everything pretty, Hilda decided as she walked along the path to her own hometown, Nuvema. With all bushes came a tiny and inexperienced Pokémon looking for a trainer, but that wasn't what she was here for. So she gave them a smile and kept on her way.

Everything felt so simple here, as though crossing into your home plate gave you knowledge but at the same time, intense modesty. Five years before she had picked up her tiny started and was sent on the chase of her life.

So, five years. It was probably time to come back, so she did.

She heard a squeaky bark behind her and watched as a lillipup raced up to her, tail wagging and tongue out, begging for her to pet it. Hilda, being as she was, certainly wasn't going to make the sweet Pokémon sad and leave it there all alone.

As she bent down and began nuzzling the baby's ears, she heard a familiar voice behind her.

"Pokémon did always take a liking to you."

Hilda's hand froze momentarily but she briefly decided to let this slide, and continued petting the puppy's ears for its pleasure.

"I suppose so."

She heard him kneel down next to her, watched his hand come toward the Pokémon and gently pet its fur. It tipped happily and jumped up.

Hilda laughed. "Then again, you did too." She looked at the boy for the first time in months, studied his wide blue eyes.

"Hello, Hilda." His voice was ever-so-slightly broken. "It's been a long time."

Rage bubbled at his nonchalant comment and she balled her fists, but honestly she was so relieved to see him that all she did was jump into his arms and embrace him.

She immediately felt him grow stiff and still, hearing his heart beat rhythmically quick. But she kept on, until he placed one tentative hand on her back and awkwardly whispered, "I missed you."

Hilda let go of him and smiled awkwardly back. "Yeah. It's been a while."

N looked down at the Pokémon, who stared at him confusedly. A look of guilt rushed to his face and he lifted up the Pokémon and began petting it again. He tried to rid his face of the concern, but watching the poor Pokémon suffer even the smallest amount still pained him in the chest.

N stood up and moved over to a tree, near the lake on Route One. Leaning back, he gently placed the lillipup on his lap and continued petting it, closing his eyes.

Hilda slowly wades over the grass to him, leaning her back against the tree back beside him. He radiates a strange sort of heat he can't explain, but she enjoys. She closes her eyelids slowly, letting comfort take hold of her and drifting off in the late afternoon.

When she wakes, the first thing she processes is the dark. Then, the young man sitting next to her. Her head has fallen into the crook of his neck and she wonders why he let it stay there, but she doesn't question it. She just takes a deep breath and lightly stretches before settling her head back down.

The lillipup from earlier is still in his lap, and she processes his hand move to its ears and scratch. "It's almost midnight, you know."

Hilda closes her eyes. "Yeah."

"It probably looked strange to any passerby, a boy and girl and lillipup all sleeping by a tree."

Hilda laughs lightly, and sits up straight. "I'm sorry I feel asleep on you."

"It's no matter." He leans back further and the puppy moves to stretch out across him. "I wasn't going to get up. The poor lillipup would fall."

Hilda smiles gently in the dark. He still loves Pokémon more than anything.

"Also I honestly didn't want the commotion of you waking up to find you had fallen asleep on me."

Hilda laughs. The biting comment might have hurt some other time, but she was too tired to care much. "I suppose that was wise of you."

They sit back in silence; the only sound that of the trees rustling and the small animal breathing shakily in its sleep.

A wind bites at Hilda's arms, and she sits up straight and crosses her arms in vain attempt to keep warm.

"You're cold," N quietly notes. "You should go back to your house and change into something warmer."

Hilda shook her head. "No. It would wake my mom up. She doesn't deserve that surprise in the middle of the night."

"Hm." He's thinking, and she is curious what about. "Here," he decides. "Come sit closer to me. Two people conserve more energy. You'll warm up."

Hilda nods faintly and inches over to him, the wind starting up again to bite her arms. He takes her arm and pulls it close so she is sitting into him.

"You have lots of goose bumps," he notes, and she nudges his arm. "You must be cold then. And your pulse is too high. It's almost as if you feel nervous."

She hates the way he leaves it like that. 'You feel nervous.' He has no idea how much he is irritating her at that moment.

"Why are you nervous?"

She knows she shouldn't blame him, that he doesn't quite get boundaries, so she just sighs.

"There's no need to be nervous of me. I'm only human."

"Mm." She mumbles it without meaning to.

"What?" His voice is deep and curious, and she won't resist his desire to know.

"You say you're only human. I forget that sometimes."

He raises his eyebrows. "Hmm. Yes, I forget that, too."

They share an empty silence and Hilda curls up into him and moans, the air still cold in the midnight sky. She wishes the sun would just come up already.

He reaches out his hand, and then pulls it back. She notes this with curiosity. "What... what is it like, to be human?"

"What do you mean? Just a moment ago you said you were one. Shouldn't you know how it is then?"

He considers this. "Well, most humans learn to be so when they are children. I had... as you might say, a not normal childhood."

Hilda looks into his eyes with wonder and sees how painfully he wants to know this. She can't blame him for his childhood. She can't even fathom what growing up with Ghetsis as a father was like.

She gives in, and pulls herself back up against the tree. "Well, I don't know, being a human is... emotional."

He raises his eyebrows then furrows them at her answer. "What do you mean by that?"

"Uh... I don't know. It's about a bunch of happiness and sadness and growing up, really." Hilda shrugged sleepily."

"The most I ever felt was passion, determination- for freeing Pokémon. I guess I never really got these, save for... well..."

Hilda grimaced. "Most feelings aren't like that. They're things like losing a battle or teaching your kid to ride a bike."

N considered. "That's interesting." He lies back, and the lillipup woke, getting down and settling in the small space between their bodies. Hilda giggled at the tiny puppy and it barked happily.

N looked into her eyes thoughtfully as she petted the creature. So full of mirth...

"Hilda?"

"Mmm?" Hilda looked up gently and the puppy followed her eyes.

"Tell me how to feel like a human." N's eyes were ablaze with curiosity and confidence.

Hilda frowned. "I can't teach you."

N returned her gesture. "Why not?" He raised an eyebrow to her.

Hilda shrugged. "Well, it's complicated, but simple. Like, humans- they're so simple that they're complicated."

"Like dry ice," N mused, "so cold that it burns you."

"Exactly," Hilda said. "I can't teach you how humans feel."

N looked at her, confused. Then she put her hand on top of his, and guided it to the lillipup.

"I can show you, though." She smiled encouragingly. "You love Pokémon, right? You feel joy around them."

N cautiously pet the dog and raised his eyebrow, but smiled. Hilda smiled too.

N wasn't sure why, but he then gripped her hand, holding it tight and close to his face.

Hilda raised her eyebrows and stared at the strange sight. N started mumbling. "Small hands, rough, works a lot. Traces of Pokémon scent." He looked at her. "You care for your Pokémon a lot."

Hilda looked at their hands and laced her fingers into his loosely. He did the same, and looked at her.

"That's not really the kind of feeling I meant."

N looked back at her. "What do you mean?"

"Well, it's like- not physical but-"

"With your mind. Endorphins being released. I know."

Hilda looked confused, then nodded. "Right, then. You do understand. You don't need my help."

He took her hand again and made her look back to him. "Tell me Hilda, please, I want to know what it feels like."

She raised an eyebrow and looked into his burning eyes. "What what feels like?"

"Love."

Hilda's face went tomato red and she looked back down to the lillipup.

"What does love feel like? Ghetsis never loved me. What is love?"

"You love your Pokémon, right? It's like that." Hilda waved it away.

"You're avoiding the question, Hilda!" He turned her around to face him, his knuckles white from gripping so hard. She grimaced. "What is it? Tell me about your mother and father. Please."

Maybe he had taught her enough, she thought, so it was her turn to teach him. That's what she believed the cause of it was.

"My parents?" She looked down. "They met on my dad's Pokémon journey. They liked each other and talked a lot and I guess that was just... Love."

N looked at her and then at his hand on her arm, and he let her go. "I'm sorry for hurting you."

Hilda lay back and closed her eyes, dipping her hand in the lake behind her. "You didn't hurt me." Her voice was small and exhausted.

N patted the lillipup and closed his eyes in bracing. "Really, Hilda." He leaned down slowly and brushed his lips on her cheek softly. "I'm sorry."

His breath on her face made her shiver, and she turned up to him, looking into her eyes, deciding that yes, this was a really bad idea.

She sat up and lifted her head to kiss his cheek in response, but he sensed her moving and turned. N's body went slack as his mouth collided onto hers with a clumsy kiss and they both blushed fiercely, both desiring to pull away first but neither desiring to actually pull away.

N collecting himself but found that rather than stopping the strange kiss, he took her hand in his, he fingers lacing between the gaps of his own. He closed his eyes and tenderly parted from her.

Hilda was profusely confused but also in a rather dreamy state and she lay back, her hand still intertwined with his.

She reddened and looked at him. "That's not what I meant to happen."

N lay back beside her and kept his hand firmly locked in hers protectively. "I don't think I've learned so much about humans in one night."

Hilda was done with emotions. She should have felt embarrassed. (And really she half-wished she did.) But instead, she just burst out laughing.

N looked at her, confusion drawn on his features. He watched he roll her head in mirth and smile.

"What? What is it?"

Hilda breathed heavily and smiled. "I don't know. That's what humans do when we don't know what to do."

N tried a chuckle and Hilda grinned. "Close enough." She laughed and sat up, yawning.

"I'm so tired." She yawned again. N picked her up and moved her to a softer bed of grass, laying her head against some flowers.

N sat down next to her and she mumbled, "Being human isn't really so bad."

The forgotten lillipup woke up and pounced on N, barking, and he let out a small smile.

"You know, Hilda, they really aren't that different from Pokémon after all."

Fin

AN: I apologize if it was a little out of character. I tried my best with these two, but since N is hard to peg and Hilda doesn't actually SPEAK, it was a little difficult to not get the romance a little off. Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed it!


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